Tuesday, December 24, 2013

The bloody Santa Myth.

Seeing red kind of furious, unable to console my son who hysterical at the thought of a strange man magically coming into our house while he sleeps, despite locked doors.

Kids at my son's class have all been asking the big "Is Santa real?" question.
Much to my dismay, these little people, developing their independent thought, are being lied to by their parents, continually insisting that Santa is real. When real, well thought out questions are asked, the kids are told if they don't believe in Santa, then they won't get presents. "If you believe in Santa, then Santa is real" What the hell are we setting our kids up for in life?

I have never lied to my kids about this. I've been 100% truthful but always asked them to play along if children in their social circles believe in Santa as I really don't want them to incur the wrath of parents who enjoy lying to their kids; however the overwhelming force of other people lying to their own children makes it impossible for my son to be peaceful and calm tonight.

I'm fine with playing a game but when you insist to your prep-aged child that Santa is real, despite their own misgivings, which they then force upon other children in fear of not getting presents on Christmas morning, I wonder if you think about the damage you're doing, not only to your own relationship with you kids when they find out you've been lying to them, but to their sense of self and knowing their own mind. When they ask you flat out "Mummy, this does not makes sense, is it real?"
I really don't mind playing along with the Santa Myth, but once that question is asked, it's game over.

My eldest meanwhile, had fun setting cookies and carrots out for Santa and his reindeer, know it is make-believe and the truth behind the mythology. Not once has she ruined the lie for other kids, and is having a great time. Happy medium.

/end Rant

1 comment:

  1. Good points. I agree 100% - the magoc of Santa is wonderful, but there is no magic in perpetuating a lie just to make things easier for the parents who don't want to have "grown up" conversations with their kids. It limits our children's growth.
    So far none of my three have questioned, and my oldest is 9, but as soon as they do we have always said that we will let them know the truth, and get them involved in setting up stuff for th eyounger ones, much as you are doing.